James Blunt Force Trauma

starring

James Blunt

Idea

James Blunt analyses a series of household objects-cum-weapons to establish which is your best option should you ever choose to smash someone to pieces.

I appreciate that a show in which James Blunt gets attacked with a series of household objects-cum-weapons will attract a bigger audience but that is just not the kind of program with which I want to be associated.

 *Cough*

Problems

My cupboards are empty and I don’t have a toolbox.

Solution

Become an officer in the British Army, write a few songs and earn the requisite amount of money to fill my home with household objects.