Community Chest Infection

Starring

Toby Young

Katie Hopkins

Ian Brown

Van Morrison

Kate Shemirani et al

Idea

Our libertarian contestants engage in a high-stakes, televised game of age-old-snooze-fest Monopoly.

Land on the Community Chest square, however, and the player is whisked to the Covid ward of their local hospital where they will remain for a period of, oh, I don’t know, 15 days.

No time to collect the $200 statutory sick pay, I’m afraid. Or PPE for that matter.

To make it less arduous, we’ll provide them with a rollout mattress.

It’s only a game after all.

Problems

I don’t own a rollout mattress and I think the camping store is closed

Solution

Let them convalesce on the floor of a cramped hospital corridor.